Whose Life Sucks More Contest

Now I know there are people who’s life sucks considerably more than mine. There are people that have it WAY worse than I do, but I’m going to be self centered and complain about MY problems and if anyone happens across this and wants to join in, you’re more than welcome.

My family is causing me so much stress that my hair is doing this sexy falling out thing. The other night when I was showering (oh shut up, perv) the hair actually clogged the drain so no water could go down! I’m hoping glue-on bows and balding chicks will be the new sexy soon so I won’t have to hide in a cave.

My brother David has decided to hand over his duties as my pain in the butt to my my brother Van. Van in turn has made my punishment for being his sister a constant stream of verbal diarrhea with a splash of putting me down in between. He’s been staying here now for a week and the pain, I assure you, has been acute. I have never EVER put him down because I know if I got started all that would be left is a pile of weeping, sniveling gunk I’d have to scrape off the bottom of my shoe. Unfortunately I suffer from something called slowness respondicus, a disease that inhibits the brain from thinking up anything witty to say until several minutes after the fact. It’s coupled with something that seems to have disappeared completely from Van’s brain, if it was ever there at all, called a conscience. Pesky thing, a conscience, it stops you from saying all the zingers that do break through because hurting your brother’s feelings would be lowering yourself to his level, and/or making for an uncomfortable situation once said. I’ll let him be the mean one, that way I won’t feel the guilt of it later.

My sister Kim isn’t speaking with my mom right now. Why? Because my mom did a very nasty thing. Yes, that’s right, she paid her rent! *gasp* How dare she! So, because my mom sent the rent directly to the landlady, instead of my sister, she obviously doesn’t trust my sister and so doesn’t deserve any thanks for saving her… once again. Of course my brother David is MORE than happy to tell my mom how my sister thinks she’s crap at any given opportunity to make himself look like a loving child. No matter that my mom’s heart breaks every time he tells her how her first daughter doesn’t want to speak with her. Idiots, I tell you!

Derek, the first grandchild and favorite of my mom’s, has decided he’s going to move here this winter with his still in high school girlfriend. Why? Because David has conned him into thinking this is a good thing. Now, my sister Kim has already raised him to be a lying, devious, spawn of satan, but moving to be with my brother David is like jumping out of the fire and into the frying pan. This can not bode well for me, as I’m sure I’ll be feeding and cleaning up after 2 teenagers and my 40-something year old teenage brother this winter. Golly-gee, I can’t wait.

Now, you might wonder… what’s so bad about all of that? So what if your brother rags on you and won’t let up? So what if your sister isn’t speaking to your mom? So what?

Well, if I wasn’t the caring person that I am, I would agree. So what? But I do care, and every time my mom knocks on my door in the middle of the night crying about something one of my retarded siblings has said, it breaks my heart. I’m running myself ragged trying to help my parents out every day, and at the end of the day I’m growing more and more bitter. I feel less and less good about myself because when someone tells you something over and over again, you start believing it.

So I welcome anyone else to talk about their craptastic lives, come on, cheer me up.