Ode To A Quiet House

The temperature of the house is quite pleasant, I think,
with peacefulness that’s quite relaxing.
No Bob calling out, “Jenny, can you get me a drink?”
or hovering over my shoulder while constantly asking, asking, asking.
The dog is filled with a little woe,
while the cat could really care less,
that my mother isn’t there to talk at them, and fuss, and pet.
My TiVo isn’t trying to record some lame game show,
and the T.V.’s volume is considerably less.
So now I can snuggle up and relax, knowing I’ve done all I did, with no regret.

It’s pretty clear that Dr. Seuss won’t be losing his job any time soon, isn’t it? I apologize for my lame attempt at writing an ode, but I had this overwhelming feeling of happiness and I wanted to express it creatively.

Mom and Skidmark (aka Bob my step-“father”) made it off to Florida yesterday and drove quite a ways before they decided to grab a hotel. I would love to say the last few days were nice and full of happiness, but it was really quite the opposite. Bob hid his camera yet again and sat while Mom and I looked for it……angrily. She asked him why he always hides it and he said, in his old-man crabby way, through gritted teeth, “I did NOT hide the camera.” So I looked at him and asked, “Then why, pray tell, can we not find it? AGAIN!” He said, “Ohhh.. so you think I hid it?” as he looked at me out of the corner of his eye. I could feel my anger meter shooting up higher, “No one cares about your camera, Bob, but you. Incase you don’t remember, and I’m sure you don’t, I have my OWN camera… and golly gee, I know EXACTLY where it is.” He said, “Well, maybe David took it?” and my mom shot him a look, “David doesn’t care about taking pictures.” so he added, “Maybe Derek took it?” This angers my mom even more. Derek, my sister Kim’s oldest has been here for a few days. So my mom jumps up from her seated position and screams, “How DARE you blame this on anyone but yourself. My son wouldn’t take anything… maybe your son would, but not mine.” And he angrily says, “Oh, shut up.”

That line, my friends, is where the last straw broke. I had been just outside their room making my way to the garage and saw him wave an angry hand in my mom’s direction as he said it. I stormed in and pointed a finger at his ugly old face and said, “Don’t you EVER tell my mother to shut up. EVER!” He said, “Mind your own business.” And so I got closer, “Oh… this is my business..” and I was crazy mad with my voice shaking, but calm, “… and if you ever say anything like that to her again, I will kick your ass. Mark my words. I don’t care how freakin’ old you are, there’s no reason for you to treat her the way you do. And I’ve had enough. Now GET UP and look for your camera.” He got up and walked out of the room, and I stormed out of the house looking for the camera in the cars. I was really too mad to really look, but I did what I could while the adrenaline pumped through me.

When I got back inside he was sitting on the couch and I said in passing, “Get up and look, Bob. You lost it, you have to help look. I’ll be damned if I’m going to make myself crazy looking for your crap while you sit there and wait for it to be dropped in your lap.” He got up and made his way to the kitchen. “It’s not in there, THINK about where you normally hide it and look there.” So he shuffled off while I stormed up to check out the upstairs rooms. He was sitting again and when I came down I was like, “What the heck, Bob? Look!” He said, “Oh, shut up.” And I walked over to him and said, “Get your ass up and look for your camera. And I meant what I said earlier, Bob, I will kick your ass if you ever talk to her that way again. Do you understand that?”

This is where it gets hilarious.

He says, “You’ll end up in that pond out back.” The man can’t even get up off the sofa without rocking back and forth to stand, and he’s going to put me in the pond? I had to laugh. I said, “Bob, your wrinkly old man threats don’t scare me. Now get up.” He sat there a second and then got up.

We finally found the darn thing a little while later, and we made fun of his “I’ll put you in the pond.” remark endlessly.

Ahh…family… can’t live with ’em…..can’t uh… yeah.

Hurricanes! Grr!

I’m telling you right now, if I don’t get a break from the crap that is taking care of my parents, I will seriously go bananas.

Yesterday as I made dinner my brother David sat with my mom and talked. I don’t really remember how it all came about, but it came to a point where he says, “The newer generations don’t care about anything but TV and computers and have NO social skills.” As he says this he begins to point at me and is nodding at my mom, who is in turn agreeing with him. Neither have realized that I’ve already turned around and see exactly what they’re doing. When my brother finally notices he quickly puts his hand down and I say nothing. I finish making dinner, serve it, eat with them… and then silently go upstairs to cry about it to Keith.

I spent the day, that day, with my mother holding her hand at her scary cancer doctor appointment, then drove her around to do little errands here and there and everywhere, one of which was atleast an hour away. I truely enjoyed the day with her, for a change, and it felt like it had been… and then this? What have I ever done to deserve being treated like an old ratty rug?

One day, she will look back and realize David, Van, the rest of them… they have their father’s blood in them… and he was nothing but crap. He beat my mom, he abused all of them, and all they do is wait around for the great big hand out of cash. I, on the other hand, I’m there for her. She comes to ME when she’s in pain, when she’s scared, when she’s sick… no one else. Me. And one day, she’s gonna go too far and I won’t be able to remove the knife that’s being stabbing and twisted deeper and deeper into my back. Pardon the drama of it all, but I’m so hurt!

When I finally brought it up today, my mom denied having agreed even though I told her I saw it with my own eyes. What the heck is wrong with people?

Everyone but my honey (and meghan) has been an f-tard to me.

Mickey Mouse, please send help!

My parents have been teasing me with the notion that they’re leaving on the 22nd, which is less than 1 week, and then Bob has a doctor’s appointment. You notice how I used the word teasing? This is because my mother has had her fingers crossed for about a month now, and driving me absolutely batty in the mean time.

I’m not the kind of person most people think I’ll be when another person starts crying. Suddenly a cold wall will go up and I’ve got to force myself to be the comforter. I guess this could be because instead of getting emotionally involved I try and fix it, and then comfort. Well, my mother has been crying at least once every day or two, and it’s ALWAYS about going to Disney World. What on earth would process a grown woman to cry at the thoughts of not going to Disney World? Well, Disney World happens to be my mom’s happy place for some messed up reason. I personally dislike the place, there’s only so much mickey crap you can handle before you cut the head off the mickey molded butter and stab it’s little buttery body.


Anyway, my mother cancelled the specialist plans for Bob today and plans on rescheduling them in December for January. They are officially leaving for Disney World next Saturday.

Thank heaven….and mickey.


I know I’ve been slacking in the wedding picture department, and I put a heck of a lot of work into this post, so it better be appreciated!

I thought it was close enough to halloween to pull out the scary stuff…

(click on the pictures to enlarge them if you dare)

the money shot


These pictures best described the wedding. Luckily my friend Meghan, her son Elek, and Keithy all kept me in rather good spirits. I took only a few of these, the rest were taken by my nephew Brandon who could get a lot closer without looking suspicious.

Perhaps in the future I’ll zero in on the really horrible things, but I’m pretty darn sure you can see them for yourself. My favorite picture is the family shot. Brandon and Chris’ expressions are priceless! One is screaming, the other making a face…. yes, be afraid boys, be very afraid.


No one guessed right, or really guessed at all (excepting, of course, Princess and Keithy). Here I thought my game was a good one! Perhaps I’ll have to find another audience.. and I think I know just the people.

Here are the answers… believe me, this pains me more than you know.

Chin #1 – Actually was B-renda.

I tried to pick a good one, but it was really hard. [deleted really evil comment]
What I want to know is… how can you NOT see the ‘stache coming in? Or the chin/beard stubble?

Chin #2 – The chin of my brother who has sorely misplaced his loyalty.

I love my brother… but what was he thinking?

Pardonnez moi…

For not posting some pictures and such sooner. I’ve been beaten down with a wicked cold and my computer seems to have gotten it too! Yes, my computer (thanks to the zillions of family members using it) has also gotten some kind of virus/malware/trojan/evilness.

Don’t worry, we’re both recovering nicely. I with my beautiful NyQuil, and my computer with McAfee.

Pictures to be posted very soon (of the wedding, not me sick).

A Moment of Weakness…

… or maybe a moment of lucidity, who knows?

I’ve entered …dunnn dunnn dunnnnnnn…..

I figure my blog and I can take a few spankings (figuratively pervos)… and hopefully get a little good feedback to go with the beat-downs. Worse comes to worse I’ll be taking a little blogging vacation.

In any case, it should be fun. Yeah… you heard me right. Fun.