B-renda: Female or Male?

Ok, this is soooo hilarious! Today was my brother Van’s birthday and we celebrated by going to Olive Garden. This, of course, was baaaad news for my parents and I because tomorrow we have to go BACK because Lisa (my step-sister) chose that exact resturant to eat at. Oh well… I’ll… have salad.

ANYWAY! My brother David was along and he and I share a hatred for my brother Van’s fiance, Brenda. I keep saying her arms are abnormally hairy and she has stubble on her chin, but no one ever believes me. Today, they all became believers.

Exibit A

Brenda the bearded woman, holding Buster.

Exibit B

Are those man arms? Did her mother, perhaps, mate with a sasquach?

Exibit C

A close-up of the beard. Don’t forget the shaved off ‘stache!

My brother’s face must be raw from all that stubble. Has this “woman” never heard of waxing? Or bleach!? Lucky for me, with my genes, my hair grows in blonde and very fine. My gosh, memories of Denise in high school bleaching her mustache come to mind. I mean, a highschooler knew how to do this, shouldn’t a grown “woman”?

I have a distant cousin that had a sex change, maybe Van is marrying an “it”?

Poor guy doesn’t have a chance.